The Kármán Line Club
For adventurous lovers where a mile just isn't high enough.
As I gear up for my next jaunt in the janky time machine, I decided to make a pit stop in this not-so-distant timeline for a wholesome snack. Naturally, I couldn't resist the allure of a tantalizing tabloid tossed into my basket. I rationalized that if I'm nourishing my body with something healthy, I could afford to indulge my mind with a bit of guilty pleasure, just this once.
Below is an OCR scan of the feature article for your reading pleasure.
CELEBRITY COUPLE'S ZERO-G BABY BOMBSHELL: SCIENTIFIC OUTRAGE AND BUSINESS BOOM!
In a scandal that's rocketing across the cosmos, a notorious celebrity couple has made interstellar history by conceiving the first human in the zero-gravity wonders of space, sparking a supernova of controversy and commercial interest. The couple, known for their audacious antics, have now joined the exclusive "Kármán Line Club", a group of thrill-seekers who share intimate moments beyond the Earth's atmosphere.
The identities of the star-crossed lovers are known, and readers can find the full exposé later in this issue. But their celestial conception has ignited a firestorm of controversy. The scientific community is up in arms, fearing that this reckless act could jeopardize ongoing studies into zero-gravity conception and gestation.
Scientists have long warned of the potential risks of space conception, including developmental abnormalities and increased risk of ectopic pregnancy. But this hasn't deterred the Kármán Line Club, whose members are drawn to the thrill of intimacy in the final frontier.
This scandalous stunt has also caught the attention of space tourism giants. Virgin Galactic, always ready to push the envelope, is reportedly considering adding a spicy new offering to their spaceflight menu. Dubbed "The Zero-G Spot", this package would provide adventurous couples with private quarters for an hour while in orbit.
As the world reels from this cosmic controversy, one thing is clear: the dawn of space tourism has brought with it a new set of challenges and opportunities. The stars, it seems, are not just the limit, but also the beginning of a new frontier in human reproduction and adventure. Stay tuned for more on this interstellar intrigue!
- you didn't !! ...you did lol. I saw this item in the "real" news. This isn't just near future, this is like today. I bet there's a couple up there right now trying to at least make the zero-g attempt in one of those parabolic planes.
- Makes me think of that Northern Exposure episode where the couples from Japan tried to conceive under the Northern Lights. Thinking SpaceWeather.com will soon have forecasts for the best celestial events under which to conceive for maximum ___<user input>____ and good fortunes. What a scream !!
ohellzyeah. Love it.