Some Respiratory Respite

Brands jump at the opportunity to demo the hottest new tech trend, air purification.

Navigating the the janky time machine is usually a breeze, but today, the AC decided to go on strike. With my usual ice-cool exploration pod acting more like a sauna, I had no choice but to roll down the windows and take a detour through a summer timeline just a few years from now. Needless to say, that plan went up in smoke—quite literally.

Fortune favored this overheated time-travel bogger when I spotted the oasis that is the Dyson Lung Lounge, parked conveniently beside a bakery. So, with a pastry in one hand and a lungful of expectations in the other, I entered this sanctuary of purified air. Nestled in this breathable haven, I was able to catch up on a backlog of timeline-appropriate emails.

Summers in this timeline are less about sundresses and ice cream, and more about smoke signals from escalating forest fires. Once a favorite summer pastime, recreational travel has been severely restricted. Camping has been banned in a majority of states and provinces. Lighters have been outlawed, presumably to prevent anyone from getting the bright idea of starting their own bonfire. And the coup de grâce? Any combustible liquid, including our beloved alcohol, has to be managed by a licensed ‘gas wrangler.’ Yes, your bourbon now comes with its own security detail. Talk about a stiff drink.

And here I thought surviving the olden lockdowns was a pain. Hold my sanitized beer, the future retorted.

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