Robobiotics
Stick to your resolutions by hacking your biome.
A quick note to the readers in my primeline.
🥳 Happy new year 🍾🥂 and welcome to 2024. 🎉
I promise not to spoil anything major that happens this year. That would be a contradiction of my code of ethics. However, I will continue to report back with hints from the near future, so you can have a think about what tomorrow might bring and how you want to help shape it.
No matter how far into the future I take the janky time machine, the turning of the temporal odometer never gets old. And neither does the quest to reset and improve ourselves. In this timeline swarmed with smart watches, rings, and even tattoos, here's something that takes New Year's Resolutions inside – quite literally!
These little buggers are the wellness industry's response to resolution fatigue. They're swallowable, biocompatible microbots, packaged like your standard over-the-counter probiotics. You choose your resolution, pop the pill, and let the microscopic minions get to work. Wanna quit smoking? There's a microbot for that. Want to boost your metabolism? Just check the box and chug that water!
Here's where the fun starts. Opting for a dry January? Your liver-loving microbot squad monitors alcohol levels in your bloodstream, coaxing your cells to produce a distaste for anything boozy with a harmless, temporary genetic tweak. You're essentially turning your own body into a bouncer that's standing guard against your less-than-stellar impulses.
Everyone's popping their resolutions like candy, making restaurants and bars shift their menus to accommodate the bizarre new eating habits dictated by legions of microbots. Cue the inevitable support groups for people who miss their vices, featuring coping strategies for outsmarting your own gut flora.
It's the ultimate invasion of helpfulness—what's more personal than your own digestive tract rallying behind your New Year's ambitions? Who needs wearables when you can command an army from within, ensuring that no slice of cake goes unsupervised again?