I took the janky time machine to the garage in some adjacent future where I ran into my pals Julian and Patrick. We were all hanging in the service center customer lounge while our respective whips got their respective repairs.

Patrick pointed out the ad on the back page of the magazine I was reading. Who’da thunk it? Tires made of a nutritious edible substrate. I noticed a pile of them next to the display in the corner, there was a sign that said “Go ahead, lick the tires”. So, I did … I went in cautiously, as if I was testing a 9V battery, and when I made contact … Licorice, yum.

Too bad I already dropped a chunk of change on my Goodyear All-Timelines, but next time the janky time machine is due for new shoes, I’m getting this tasty set.